still here......hanging on.........

Yesterday, I spent most of the day

 on the computer.  

That is very rare.

 Usually during the school year, 

the kids are on the computer all day

 doing various assignments.  

Waking Up

 

It has been a long winter. 

 Your kindness and encouragement 

have helped me through it.  

My journey to find the source and conquer chronic, severe headaches led to answers,

 but no real solutions.  

In the meantime, 

I've had a very interesting journey through the strange and unsettling side effects of some powerful prescription meds.

The Silent Time

One- sixth of the new year has 

passed in silence 

on this blog.  

Not, of course, in my life. 

 I told someone that I had nothing to say, 

but that isn't really true.  

There are just some things that seem to have captured my attention and have taken my coherent thoughts from me.

Remember Pearl

A friend had a book proposal returned

 with the explanation that, 

"People today, would not be able to relate to her stories of growing up in the 1940's". 

This did not make any sense to me. 

If that is true, then what does that say about those who have followed what has been dubbed 

"The Greatest Generation"? 

When I mentioned that today was 

"Pearl Harbor Day",

my daughter said, 

"Oh." 

I realized then, that I needed to make sure the youngest of my children understands

 what that means.

Carol of Summer

The month was August.

 I "thought" I was having contractions.

 Turns out,

 I was having a few "mild" ones 

that weren't really doing anything. 

I was ten days past my due date and feeling very irritated. 

The Hinge in the Middle

I was thirty years old and living 

in a hotel in Ohio with my husband 

and three children under the age of ten. 

 It was yet another stage of the journey 

and it was an exciting time. 

All of our belongings were 

in our house in Tennessee. 

We had the essentials with us.....

clothing, school books, 

dolls, cars, building blocks.....

and some diapers and onesies and sleepers......

My parents had the bassinet at their house 

two hours away.

Baby number four would soon be making his appearance and 

we could not find a house to rent.......

Finally, we found a house....

but we could not get it until 

AFTER

 my due date.  

Everyone figured that would be fine 

because I always went

 two weeks past my due date.

In the meantime, 

our eleventh wedding anniversary rolled around and my husband surprised me by arranging for us to renew our vows. 

You need to know that God had moved us 

from Tennessee back to Ohio where we had lived for a couple of years 

and our church family became very dear to us. 

 So, the morning of our anniversary, 

I awoke to realize that I could breathe again

 but could barely walk, 

which is a very good sign for an expectant mama. 

I had visions of renewing our vows and then having a new baby for an anniversary present.

Not God's plan.......

nope.......

an entire month went by........

We moved into an empty rental house and 

I cleaned it. 

Mom and Dad brought over the bassinet. 

Our church family loaned us

 beds, chairs, tables, sofa, lamps....

you name it.....

and then,

 at the two week mark past the due date, 

we went to the hospital.

This little guy had some trouble during labor

 and had to be coaxed here.....

but....

when he was born, 

he was holding on to his umbilical cord. 

We wondered if that was why his heart rate dropped so suddenly and stayed there. 

 Then he ended up in another hospital 

under bili-lights.  

Let's just say that 

his entrance into the world 

was not calm and peaceful.

This child learned to speak 

in complete sentences 

at age one. 

And then, 

when we moved from Ohio 

to the far away state of Louisiana, 

he began making friends.  

Once again, we were living in a hotel.....

with four children and another on the way......

once again, we had left our home and were looking for a new one.

This time, Tommy became the star and 

we all got the very best treatment because of him. 

It is not your average two year old who can hold complete conversations with adults.....

but he could. 

I was always a little leary because I never knew what he would say.  

At the end of our extended three month stay at the hotel, 

the staff gave us a going away party and a gift.

Once, shortly after we moved into our house, 

I was in the check-out line in Walmart. 

I heard his little voice say, 

"Are you a boy or a girl?".  

I heard a man's voice say, 

"Excuse me?"  

And yes, Tommy repeated it....

"Are you a boy or a girl?".

 I turned to see a man with a bandana around his forehead an a very long pony tail.  

He did not seem offended and they struck up a conversation. 

Then I heard my son telling the man that he was having a birthday and this man and his wife should come to the party. 

The man chuckled and said,

"When's your birthday?"  

To which Tommy promptly replied, 

"October 19th.  It never changes."

After the man got control of his laughter, 

he asked Tommy how old he was going to be.  

"I'm two, but I'm fixin' to be five."  

Tommy had already picked up the "fixin' to be" of Louisiana. 

He was, in fact, "fixin' to be" three. 

Tommy kept inviting the man and told him 

at one point that he had,

 "just moved here from Ohio and didn't have our new address memorized yet, but my mom can tell you where we live".  

The man told him that he was a truck driver. 

He didn't think he could make it to the party, 

but he had a gift for him anyway....

and handed Tommy a one-dollar bill.

His verbosity did not always go so well

 with all adults.  

Once, in the same Walmart, 

an employee asked Tommy if he was all ready for Santa Claus to come. 

He looked at her and said,

 "Lady, don't you know Santa Claus isn't real?"  

I got glared at for that one and had to tell him not to tell people that Santa isn't real, 

especially grown-ups because they will get upset.

Being  a smart little kid was not always easy.  Some grown ups did not take him seriously when he asked about scientific things. 

We left one particular hobby shop without a motor he wanted for an airplane he was building. 

All of theirs were too large and

 they just did not understand what he was explaining to them that he wanted to do. 

But he understood they were laughing at him......

he said he would never go there again.  

We went to the local science museum and 

they had just what he was looking for 

and understood 

what he was wanting to build.

Tommy ended up being the

 "hinge" 

in the middle of seven kids. 

Boys as bookends with two girls in-between.

 With the stretch of years between boys, 

I guess they technically are all "first-born sons" according to the birth order books. 

Uniqueness is definitely a trait of middle kids.

He is not a little kid anymore.....

he is on the edge of adulthood......

the future is full of such bright possibilities. 

God has gifted him with an intellect that is very curious about life. 

He has been gifted musically. 

He has been given favor with man.

As I watch him grow and think and challenge his thinking, 

my prayer is

 that he remain

 grounded in the love of Christ.

 Truly, God has protected him,

 not just in the womb, 

but out of it many times. 

The Lord has an amazing plan for each child 

He creates. 

It is such a privilege to be a witness to a young life unfolding in all of its promise.

                                  

  Happy Birthday, Tommy!

A Lesson of Grace

On a hot summer night twenty-one years ago, 

God gave me a baby girl 

who was much prayed over. 

She was the third blessing added to our family

 and I was beginning to learn about a very real, very personal God who cares about the 

tiniest details of my life.

Twelve and Terrific!

As I told you in my last post, we celebrated an important birthday in our house near the end of June. The smallest and last that I birthed has been a most delightful joy to all of us.  

His birth came just a bit early due to some complications that I'd never experienced before, but all was well, and since he was the smallest in birth weight, he was dubbed "peanut" by me. 

But, not for long.  

Winding Down, Gearing Up, or Just Plowing Straight Ahead

May is nearing an end. 

Co-op is over...

field trips and gym days, nearly so....

graduations are happening......

book sales have started. 

My school room is spilling into the dining room as I clean up and clear out and try to figure out what to keep and what to store.  Intead of feeling the excitement of nearing the end of a school year, we will have to keep going a bit longer with a shorter break this year. To me, it feels like October...and I'm still unsure of what I'm doing.

Shadows of the Mind ~ Shadows of the Heart

She cannot verbalize what is bothering her.

Her behavior is self-destructive and mystifying.

Prayers are offered up to the One who knows the secret places of the soul.

Lost! (Not the Show)

On Monday around supper time, the kids and I were leaving the elementary school where we attend Good News Club.  

On the way home, I started looking for the small little card holder that I had brought with me which held my license, insurance cards, bank cards, etc......

It Was Gone!

A Needed Word

The weekly physical therapy appointment gives an hour to catch up on grading papers.

 Not much was done last week because I was not here to oversee it.

 Not much was understood because I was not here to explain it. 

Instead, my time was diverted by a child whose needs seem to be growing every day.

Pray for Haiti

I've been watching the news, along with many of you,and have seen the destruction from the earthquake in Haiti.  There is such devastation. Such anguish. Such misery.

 Immediately, I thought of my brother-in-law and his family who, with their church, have gone to Haiti many times to minister to the people there. They have at least one mission there....and they have friends there. 

I was thankful when he called this evening to say that he had heard from his friends and they are okay....the mission is okay......in one of the areas.  There are other areas that they have not heard from yet.

Tonight there are thousands of people who are not accounted for....whose families and friends are waiting to hear if they are safe....Some of them are Americans......Some are native Haitians.....Some vacationers.....

Some met the Lord ......some met Eternity without Him......

It will be many days before help can get to these people. Some will die waiting.

Please join with me and pray for the people of Haiti. Pray that the Lord will be with those who are suffering and those who are waiting. Pray for the people who are bringing help to those who are helpless....for their safety and strength.

Pray for the orphan.

Pray for the widow.

Pray,  knowing that above all else, God is El Elyon. The Most High God who rules and reigns over heaven and earth. He is in control.

He knows.

He sees.

He hears the cries of the afflicted.

He is there............If you want to be His hands and feet, prayerfully consider giving here.

Moment of Silence

     From the time I left the house yesterday, until the time I came home in the evening, I only had a chance to stop in for ten minutes. The day was filled with various co-op classes and the weekly library visit with a grocery store stop and medical appointment thrown in.  

Before I left for the day, I watched Fox and Friends who were doing their morning news show live from the deck of the USS New York. 

This brand new Navy ship was constructed with over 7 tons of steel from the ruins of the Trade Center Towers in New York. 

USS NEW YORK

     

It was stirring to watch the footage of the Marines and Sailors on board the vessel raising the colors just as they do every morning 

and to hear the stories of how the ship was

 made in New Orleans, Louisiana. 

I lived in northwest Louisiana for twelve years and remember seeing updates on the ship's progress from time to time.  

Hurricane Katrina caused obvious delays but the workers came back to finish the ship. 

It is a working ship and will carry Marines to fight terrorists. 

The Towers will have gone full circle. 

 They will be fighting back.

     On the drive to the last appointment of the evening, I heard the devastating news of the shooting at Ft. Hood in Texas. 

As an Army mom, my heart was stricken. 

Since details were very few, all I could do was speculate on the cause.  

My evening ended with few details to answer all of the questions in my mind. 

My heart was grieved for the families involved. My heart which was earlier stirred by patriotism was now subdued.

     Today, I watched as the military officials sorted out the facts for us. 

The shooter was not dead.

 He is on life support. 

He was a psychiatrist previously working with hurting soldiers at Walter Reed Medical Center. He was recently transferred to this new post. 

He had never been deployed and did not want to be deployed now. 

Other stories said he was giving away possessions. In the midst of hearing these disturbing bits of news, other stories were told.

     It was graduation at the Army Post.  

Medic Officers ran to offer assistance still dressed in caps and gowns when they heard the gunshots. A Private loaded wounded soldiers into his pick-up truck and took them to the emergency room. 

Others provided first-aid even though they were wounded themselves. 

My heart began to fill with the unmistakable sense of patriotism. 

Of being proud to be a citizen of a country where men and women daily make willing sacrifices in service to their country and to their fellow man.

     I witnessed a Moment of Silence for the fallen and their families.

 I saw the flag at half-mast. 

It was a striking contrast to the raising of the flag on the USS New York yesterday. 

In the midst of each of our opinions as to how our country should address the War on Terror, 

must be 

gratitude for the members of our Armed Forces, prayers for them and for their families, 

and thankfulness to God that 

He is ultimately in control of every aspect in our lives and in the life of our great nation.

photos: American flag at Ft. Campbell, KY (c) debbie richardson